Your body isn’t broken. It’s just loud.
I’ve been enjoying Dr. Laura Anderson’s Substack series on how trauma impacts perimenopause.
In one of her recent posts, she discussed how we often look at our bodies during perimenopause as if they are breaking down. But a more helpful reframe might be to see our bodies as finally speaking loudly after years of speaking quietly.
When I turned 40, I experienced what so many people do in this season of life. I suddenly had more clarity about what was important to me and much less patience for the things that weren’t. It’s been refining as I continue to hone in on what matters to me and resist giving my energy to things I no longer value.
It makes perfect sense to me that my body would start doing the same thing. While it might look like I don’t have energy for certain things anymore, what’s really happening is that my body refuses to push through places where I never had the energy to begin with.
If I work a 13-hour day, my body will understandably be tired by the end of it and may be so exhausted the next day that I can’t be as productive. My body is saying, “Nope. This is not going to be a regular thing for us anymore. If you work 13 hours, you need to rest.”
One thing that’s been harder for me to accept is my body’s response to travel. Travel really takes a toll on me, especially flying or long drives. I often need a full day to recover on both ends, sometimes longer.
I still love to travel and don’t plan to give it up, but I do have to be gentle with myself. For my recent trip to Chicago, I took the train because I knew it would be easier on my body than flying. I arrived a day earlier than the friend I was meeting so I could have time to relax and recover from the journey. I made sure I ate fruit in the morning in case I didn’t get fresh food the rest of the day, drank my electrolytes, and gave myself slower mornings.
My days of suicide trips—driving to and from a different city within 24 hours—are over. But honestly, I don’t think that’s healthy for anybody, and I’m okay with my body deciding it doesn’t want to do that anymore.
My energy is precious, and my body and I are working together to preserve it and spend it only on what we really care about.
My body isn’t breaking down. It’s just getting really loud about what it’s willing to do.
When I travel, I never go anywhere without these items:
This eye mask works great for side sleepers and wild sleepers, which I definitely am. I’ve tried many different eye masks, and this is my favorite. It’s affordable and comes in a pack of three, so I keep one in my suitcase and one by my bed.
I’ve also tried a lot of travel sound machines. This one has basic white noise, which is exactly what I want, and there’s no looping sound. White noise apps on my phone always seem to have an annoying loop, so having a dedicated sound machine works much better for me.
I’ve had this travel yoga mat for seven years, and it stays in my suitcase so it’s always with me when I travel. It folds up, so you can use it on gross hotel room floors without the floor side touching the side you practice on when you pack it away again. It’s compact and fits perfectly in the front slip pocket of my suitcase.
Until next time,
—Katherine
If you’re an ambitious or creative woman (or both!) looking for trauma-informed support while you navigate your life and future:
Use this link to book a free 20 minute consultation.
Read more about what I learned about my body through studying trauma in my latest book, A Thousand Tiny Paper Cuts: